Right now we are staying with my brother and his family, with the five of us in one bedroom. All of my boys' toys are in storage, so my sons are feeling like outsiders here. My brother's kids have toys but one his youngest has a bit of an issue with sharing. I fight back tears of sorrow when I see my son being rejected by his cousin. There is little I can do to change things for my sons right now. I just pray that we can buy a decent house soon.
I have gone the past few weeks, essentially since we left California, without Zoloft. I finally found the prescription yesterday and am not sure if I should go back on it or not. We still need to......I just lost my train of thought.
My life as it is. God,my husband, kids, etc. All these aspects in my life that I love and cherish. Even the ones that frustrate as well.
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Friday, August 27, 2010
The End Has Come
August 3, 2010 marked the last day of Navy life for us. It has been a harsh reality these past few weeks. Now in Texas with family, Everette has started a new job and we are looking for a place to call home. There does not seem to be any apartments really available. The homes here are mostly older homes that are in severe need of repair. The idea of moving my family into one is painful and I am resisting it with every fiber of my being. This week I found a house on 1.5 acres that I have fallen in love with and want to tour the inside. I have been unusually excited about the idea of this house. That being said, my sister-in-law told me this evening that there is another couple at her church looking at this same house and that it needs to sell quickly. We still need to get approved for a VA loan. Then Everette tells me today that he doesn't want to stay here. So I feel "what's the point of looking for a house if we aren't going to make it permanent?" I just want to settle down once and for all. How odd, I grew up in the same house-19 years. For the past 13 years we have moved so many times, I can scarcely count. Now I just want o find that forever home. The one. The house of my dreams. God, is there such a thing? Is it possible that we might finally have that? Can it be now? Please.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
lost, found, late and rescheduled.
This morning I had a WIC appointment scheduled for 9am out in town. I finally have custody of the van today to do this and a couple other things. Getting close to 9, so I load the boys into the van and make sure I have my id, wic folder, cell phone, bill or some proof of address, and LES (paycheck stub). Wait, where is the LES that I had in the van since last week? It's missing and dh doesn't know his log in information, and doesn't remember where he wrote it down.
Cancel WIC, reschedule for next week. Ok, let's go geocaching with the two little ones. This will be fun. Stop one, find. Two and three, no luck. Four was a fun find at the California Welcome Center. Five and six were a bust, and Seven was an adventurous find. Fuel up the tank and now I headed to the back gate to base to deliver a wallet to my husband. Thought he was at the base theater for his TAMP class, so after sitting in the parking lot with two sleeping boys, pulling them both out of the van to go into the theater, I find out the class has been relocated to a point down the street.
I drop of the wallet, nearly throwing it out the window to him as I rush to pick up number one son who has now beat me home. There was a volunteer Tea at the school scheduled from 1-2pm. Went to that, then had a hard time finding the two older boys on the playground, because now I have to rush over to Naval Hospital for a Dr. appointment at 2:20pm. Guess who was ten minutes late? That's right, you guessed correctly. I was late. Wasn't sure if they were going to see me.
Picked up husband, came home. My head hurts, my kids are tired beyond belief and I have no idea what to do about dinner. On the up side, I got a cool little certificate for helping out at my son's school.
Cancel WIC, reschedule for next week. Ok, let's go geocaching with the two little ones. This will be fun. Stop one, find. Two and three, no luck. Four was a fun find at the California Welcome Center. Five and six were a bust, and Seven was an adventurous find. Fuel up the tank and now I headed to the back gate to base to deliver a wallet to my husband. Thought he was at the base theater for his TAMP class, so after sitting in the parking lot with two sleeping boys, pulling them both out of the van to go into the theater, I find out the class has been relocated to a point down the street.
I drop of the wallet, nearly throwing it out the window to him as I rush to pick up number one son who has now beat me home. There was a volunteer Tea at the school scheduled from 1-2pm. Went to that, then had a hard time finding the two older boys on the playground, because now I have to rush over to Naval Hospital for a Dr. appointment at 2:20pm. Guess who was ten minutes late? That's right, you guessed correctly. I was late. Wasn't sure if they were going to see me.
Picked up husband, came home. My head hurts, my kids are tired beyond belief and I have no idea what to do about dinner. On the up side, I got a cool little certificate for helping out at my son's school.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
flowers flowers everywhere
Head Colds and the Zoo
Yesterday my friend, a Corpsmen in the Navy, invited us (myself, Everette and boys) to go with her to the San Diego Zoo. There was this idea that Active Duty military plus their family members would get free admission to the Zoo. We get to the ticket booth, Everette mentions military and waves his hand over the kids and myself, and the gentleman says just show ID at the entry gate. We are so excited as we approach the turnstiles, until the attendant there tells us that Everette gets in free but the children and I must go purchase tickets. Fine. Now, we have already spent several minutes in the line, only to not be admitted to the zoo. At guest relations I plead my case only to be told that the tickets for myself and two of the boys will cost me $82. My heart sinks with disappointment as I think about the cost as well as the amount of time it took to find a parking space in the back-end of the lot. This is the second time that i have come and not been able to go in.
My friend, so giving without hesitation, offers to split the cost. I can handle $40. We get in and realize that we only have a couple of hours before the exhibits close, when I turn to find the two boys viewing a large map of the Zoo, planning our adventure. Already, they have a plan while we adults are still trying to figure out where we are on the map in our hands. We go with the plan of a 4 year old and 8 year old. What fun, as we sea lions, parrots, lizards and snakes. A turtle flipped over on its back that struggles to flip over, and accomplishes that as we all watch on.
We had a wonderful time, and I enjoyed taking pictures with my new camera. Towards the end however, I begin to feel the makings of a cold coming on. This morning I feel it full bore. From the neck up, I feel miserable. I know where this has come from: my 22 month old son, who has had a very leaky nose the past few days. I feel so bad for him, that he has felt so miserable and no one really knew just how he felt.
My friend, so giving without hesitation, offers to split the cost. I can handle $40. We get in and realize that we only have a couple of hours before the exhibits close, when I turn to find the two boys viewing a large map of the Zoo, planning our adventure. Already, they have a plan while we adults are still trying to figure out where we are on the map in our hands. We go with the plan of a 4 year old and 8 year old. What fun, as we sea lions, parrots, lizards and snakes. A turtle flipped over on its back that struggles to flip over, and accomplishes that as we all watch on.
We had a wonderful time, and I enjoyed taking pictures with my new camera. Towards the end however, I begin to feel the makings of a cold coming on. This morning I feel it full bore. From the neck up, I feel miserable. I know where this has come from: my 22 month old son, who has had a very leaky nose the past few days. I feel so bad for him, that he has felt so miserable and no one really knew just how he felt.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
FMF
On Monday Everette went before the Murder Board for the FMF pin. He passed. This morning he is doing the final board, and if he accomplishes this then tomorrow he will take the E-5 exam. Then the wait is to June or so to find out if he advances. If so, he will stay in the Navy a few more years.
Elisha adventures
Elisha, 20 months old, sits at the dining table with a pile of gold fish crackers in front of him. He could eat the crackers, but instead he puts them, one by one, down his onesie. Once all fish are inside, he pats his tummy, effectively crushing each little gold fish cracker. Now, he has a pile of crumbs inside his onesie. Perhaps he plans to save them for later. Is he part squirrel? Now he sits in front of me on the table, examining the treasure he hides, and then leans forward to rest his head upon mine. Elisha starts to nurse and his crumbs are slipping through his pants and onto my lap.
Earlier he took one of my shirts from the laundry pile and put it on. Everything he does, he does with an intense purpose. I wish I could get inside that little mind to understand that purpose. Elisha is a fascinating little boy.
Earlier he took one of my shirts from the laundry pile and put it on. Everything he does, he does with an intense purpose. I wish I could get inside that little mind to understand that purpose. Elisha is a fascinating little boy.
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